Hello Boys, I’m Ba-ack!

What lasts 4 weeks, is extremely arduous, and may feature Brigitte Nielsen?  No, not Flavor Flav’s new sitcom.  REHAB! 

That’s right, for the past month I’ve been unable to post because I was busy joining the ranks of an elite few: Lindsay, Mischa, Jeff Conaway. Alright, maybe not an elite few, more like a smattering of hoi polloi.

But I’m back and ready comment on [fake] celebrity news.  What was I in rehab for, you ask?  How dare you!  That’s personal and solely my business!  I would expect you to respect my privacy and cease this disgusting desire to pry into other people’s hardships.  

Now on to the celebrity gossip…